Most days I only want to do one thing – turn off all the lights, lie down on my bed with headphones on, and listen to an entire Broadway cast recording from start to finish. I have yet to accomplish this, and I’ll tell you why.
The inside of my brain is like one of those secret rooms in spy movies that have red lasers darting everywhere. You know when the lead character has to contort their body in order to avoid touching the lines and the alarm going off? Well in my mind, the operation never succeeds and then my thoughts start buzzing like crazy.
As a result, I speak really fast. I’m the family chatterbox. Sometimes things come out of my mouth before my brain’s even processed it. My thoughts go in several directions and I get way too excited about everything, but I just know if I keep too much information to myself, I’ll explode.
I’ve spent most of my life devoted to entertainment. I constantly consume it and crave it. I am a victim of the television binge-watch phenomenon. I love keeping up to date with film festivals and burning through an actor’s filmography. I love listening to music and seeing artists live in concert. I love reading autobiographies, watching late-night talk shows and hours of ballroom dancing competitions. Sometimes I fear that I won’t be able to enjoy every single thing the entertainment world can offer me because time is running out.
However, some days I have to get down from the cloud. Real life is just as wonderful and important; and keeping grounded is something I have to remind myself to do every day. I have to remember that I too, have a voice and the ability to create something for the world.
When I was four, I had to get a hearing aid in my right ear. It turns out that the nerve in my left ear had shrunk to almost nothing, so the best solution was to enhance the ‘good’ ear. I feel fortunate to have had doctors who made it a fun childhood experience (I’ve had aids in different colours!), but it didn’t bother me, because now everything I heard was louder and richer. Now it’s become a part of my life, like wearing glasses. It’s been a blessing and a curse. I’m only reminded when people notice me wearing it, or when I have headphones on, because I never hear the ‘left’ stereo track. In a way, I believe I was born this way in order to stay grounded. I encourage you to find the thing in your life that reminds you of how special an individual you are. How nobody else can offer what you have to offer.
It’s so easy to feel sorry for yourself, but let me tell you, it’s the most unproductive thing you can do. We all have things we wish we could change, but we forget that we also have each other. We have stories and experiences that could help others. This is what Sisters & Stuff is all about. It’s about embracing the positive and feeling less alone. It’s about practicing gratitude and living for the greatness of every day.
I’ve had twenty-odd years of life experience and I’m still trying to figure things out. There’s so much I want to do, so much to see and so much to hear, but in the meantime I want to be happy. So I encourage you to share your beautiful, meaningful, uplifting stories with us. Your uniqueness? Own it.